To connect with your essential joy, you need to let go of resentments and anger from the past.
Why do we stop ourselves from sharing our true thoughts and feelings? How do we start to be more open to ourselves and to others? There are many possible answers. Let’s begin with old hurts and resentments.
When people in our past have not lived up to our expectations, when they have treated us in ways that disappointed us, hurt our feelings or made us feel unimportant, it is very difficult to not be adversely impacted If we had been capable of responding directly to these insults at the time, and expressed appropriate anger, we would have no need to be resentful and stuck. But, that is not always possible.
Anger is a normal, human emotion…
Early in life we are often made to feel that anger and anger reactions are unjustified not permissible or are not healthy. We then lose our connection to our real feelings and they get buried. We weren’t taught that what we are feeling has purpose. What takes their place are lingering, simmering, resentments that we are not even fully aware of. These resentments show up in more indirect ways; for instance, we withhold our generosity, our openness, We may become more cautious, less direct, and less enthusiastic towards the people who are in our lives.
This style of burying the fire of angry rageful and disappointed feelings can lead to much difficulty in loving, sharing and giving. Even if the people in our current life are not doing these hurtful things to us, we hold these patterns from the past and cannot allow our feelings to flow. We get stuck.
Dynamic psychotherapy helps you to see how these old grievances are played out on a daily basis and how they deprive us of a more joyful and self-expressive life. These grievances deprive us of relaxed and playful ways of being with those with whom we want to be close, as well as those with whom we want and need better connections.
Psychotherapy for Anger, Upper West Side, NYC
My practice is located on the Upper West Side of Manhattan and I have been helping individuals and couples work through anger and resentments they have been carrying with them. If you would like to reach out to me for help through this time, please contact me here.